mindtangle

Liquor? I barely even know her!

My friends and I have spent an embarrassing number of hours reliving our adolescent days, coming up with these groan-worthy puns. Occasionally, a few will touch upon the absurd and, very rarely, the sublime. After the jump I present to you the current, canonical list of Er-jokes. Add more in the comments or in emails and I’ll keep the list updated.

Note: The best ones from the comments have been added to the canon as of 10/21/2008.

  • Actuator Assembly
  • All-Night Bender
  • Amplfier Response
  • Backpacker
  • Bitter Almonds
  • Bitter End
  • Bittersweet Chocolate
  • Bone Doctor
  • Border Collie
  • Border Crossing
  • Brandy Snifter
  • Bulk Uploader
  • Buster Poindexter
  • Buster Keaton
  • Butterfinger
  • Caesar
  • Can Opener
  • Catcher in the Rye
  • Cedar Junction
  • Cedar Chest
  • Cedar Drawers
  • Cherry Picker
  • Clam Digger
  • Cocoa Butter
  • Cocker Spaniel
  • Consumer Awareness
  • Consumer Goods
  • Consumer Products
  • Copperhead
  • Cross-Compiler (AB)
  • Disassembler (AB)
  • Elevator Action
  • Elevator Button
  • Elevator Shaft
  • Elixir
  • Engelbert Humperdinck
  • Exeter
  • Evildoer
  • Explore Outer Space
  • Feeder Pipe
  • Fertilizer
  • Fiddler Crabs
  • Fiddler on the Roof
  • Filler Items
  • Flying Saucer
  • Former Tight End
  • Governor Schwarzenegger
  • Hacker Conventions
  • Hoover Dam
  • Impeller Inlet
  • Inflator Figure
  • Inner Back Bay
  • Inner Ear
  • Inner Harbor
  • Inner Peace
  • Inner Sanctum
  • Innerspace (Movie)
  • Inner Tube (See Also: Rubber Inner Tube)
  • Inner Workings
  • Insider Knowledge
  • Inspector Gadget
  • Jabberwocky
  • Liquor and Wine
  • Liquor Box
  • Liquor Cabinet
  • Liquor Filled Bon-Bons
  • Liquor in the Front, Poker in the Rear
  • Mike Ditka
  • Non-Dairy Creamer
  • Nutter Butter
  • Oakland Raider
  • Orel Hershiser
  • Oven-Stuffer Roaster
  • Plumber Crack
  • Poconos (Terrible, we know, but bears mentioning due to this Onion article)
  • Poker Face
  • Polar Bear
  • Polar Coordinates
  • Power Bottom
  • Preprocessor (AB)
  • Puffer Fish
  • Pumpernickel Muffin
  • Quarterpounder
  • Resonator Cavities
  • Raider Tight End
  • Rochester
  • Rubber Chicken
  • Rubber Dinghy
  • Rubbermaid
  • Scout’s Honor
  • Scratch ‘n Sniff Sticker
  • Seeker Head
  • Sniffer Dog
  • Soccer Ball
  • Stream Parser (AB)
  • Stretcher
  • Sucker Cups
  • Suckerfish
  • Sucker for Punishment
  • Sucker Punch
  • Supercollider
  • Tailor-Made
  • Taper Down
  • Tinker Toy
  • Tire and Rubber
  • Tire Sealer and Inflator
  • Toaster Oven
  • Tokenizer (AB)
  • Trick or Treat
  • Tupperware (see archaic definition for “tup”)
  • Upper Back Bay
  • Uppercut
  • User Interface
  • Vacuum Cleaner Parts
  • Ventilator Shaft
  • Visitor Center
  • Watermelon (Best said as: “You want me to watermelon?!”)
  • Whippersnapper
  • Whistleblower
  • Wicker Basket
  • William Shatner (FTW!!!!)
  • Woodpecker

Bonus! Other pronoun-jokes:

  • Homo Erectus
  • Official Dictum
  • Parnassus
  • Cornerman (well, it’s an -er, but the subject is an -im, so I’ll put it here)

(Note: a lot of these come from this old MIT page)

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